Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency
Season OneDVD - 2017
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There's a reason why the Neanderthals fell to the Homo Erectus. Do you think you are capable of being more aggressive?
-Yes, ma'am. Very Erectus. Much more aggressive.
Do we... Do we try to contact ourselves?
-I suppose we can't, because we didn't, right? Like... if we don't remember it, then it didn't happen, so it's possible or probable that we... that we... If we were to...
I'm an ineffectual in a generalized scramble of disappointment and incompetence.
-No, no. Listen, you're only some of those things.
Dude, seriously?! A magic detective and hot chick want you to come hang with them, and you're acting like it's the worst thing ever?
I mainly attract people in positions of absolute hopelessness so I think you fit into that quite nicely. No offense.
-Just, be quiet.
Everything is connected. But only I can see it. I'm not psychic. But I am... something. When I was young, I would get... intuitions about things, little hunches about the way the universe worked. But they never... It was like reading in another language, like signs with symbols I didn't understand. -Well, then why don't you, you know, use it to keep yourself safe or...
Because that's not how it works. The hunches don't help me... ever. So I figured I might as well use them to try to help other people. You're the first person who's actually stuck around and helped.
Well, I just wish you'd stop saying you're an asshole. I don't think you are, so it comes off a bit cheap.
Have you not been listening? It's very easy to act like a jerk, and then say, "Well, I'm a jerk, so that's that."
You're a person of interest, permanently, even though you're not necessarily an interesting person.
-That feels unnecessarily rude.
Seattle's a big city.
-The city doesn't matter. Either I go to the target, or the... the target goes to me. The city's just a backdrop.
Look, I can't explain it, okay? I learned a long time ago that things don't always make sense the way people want them to. I accept that, and you're going to have to, too.
"Project Incubus," a.k.a. "The Rowdy 3." Normally, confronting these subjects would be a 40-man operation. I'd want 10 men for every one of them.
-Well, I appreciate your confidence in me providing adequate support, sir.
Corporal Friedkin... did you read the files I gave you?
-Yes, sir. I read them. It was a couple days ago, though, and some of the words were really hard to understand.
-Yeah, pork. You know, pig?
Why do people call it "pork"?
-So we don't feel guilty about eating pigs.
I never seen any of this before.
-You've never had Chinese food?
I never been to China.
That's what we'll put on the sign for the detective agency, Farah. "Cases Solved With Arguable Efficiency."
You need a hobby
-I have a hobby
Being sad is not a hobby
S-Shut up with that shxt!
-You kiss your mother with that mouth, Cross?
You shoot up a mall in the middle of the day, and we just happen to get away? I walk you into a crowded hotel with a knife in your leg, and we just happen to not get noticed? It's the universe, it's the stream of creation. I have been doing nothing every day of my life, and thinking it was that, nothing, it was nothing. Okay, but now I can see it, and I don't know what it is, and I can't name it, but I've seen it. All right, and that's greater than understanding.
That homicidal dirt muppet and I have never crossed paths before.
I mean, two weeks ago, you were a 33-year-old hotel bellhop with no money and no friends who spent all of his time lying to me.
I didn't have pararibulitis.
Look Dirk I'm just trying to deal with the realities you keep dragging me into. You climbed the fence, you cranked the thing, you fell into the thing.
-Let's not reinvent the truth. That fence was not climbed, just ambitiously fondled.
We had a big file on that. Big files on, like, everything. And what do they want me to do, read 'em all? I can't do that. It's... It's boring. I... I just wanted to be in charge, but what they don't tell you is that, once you're in charge, there's all this other, like, blah-bleh-bleh-bleh-bleh, top secret, bleh.
I didn't lie. I'd think you of all people know what a lie looks like by now.
You've been making choices out of desperation for too long.
Frightening or Intense Scenes: There are several scenes with killing and death.
Violence: There is a fair amount of violence, one of the main characters is a "holistic assassin" so there violence there. And there also fight and combat-type scenes as well.
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